What I am looking for in a fish tank and life is beauty and relaxation. I do not want piranha death fish ruining my aquatic experience, but sure enough after I set up my fish tanks with air bubbles, two filters and beneficial bacteria among other things, I see death at the bottom of the tank. I deny death. I defy death. I say to myself, "The fish will resurrect from the dead." By death always wins.
If a giant hand reached from the sky holding a net and flipped me into a plastic bag and then 30 minutes later I was put into a new reality, I might just have a heart attack and die on the spot. So perhaps new fish dying should not be so surprising or people dying as we are constantly being shifted into new experiences and thrown into turmoil without adequate support. But still, death is always a shock and a disappointment and a feeling that somehow you have failed someone.
I look for non aggressive fish in my tanks, but for some reason they arrive ready to fight and that does not calm me, but contributes to my angst. At some point, I realized what I see as fighting is actually fish fucking, which makes me more unsettled. All I know is that either fighting, fucking or dying is going on in my fish tanks and I cannot do much about it.
It is a wonder nature can excel at maintaining the environment if humans don't spoil things because just keeping alive house plants or fish in a fish tank is tough.
And keeping your self alive is the biggest challenge with all the adversity one deals with and one day, you wake up dead.
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